The Downside of Facebook and How Tea Helps.


I’ve been spending the past few months shut up in my little writing room getting down the thriller that suddenly came to me one night about four months ago. Now, I really didn’t need this thriller popping into my head when it did. I’d already started a lovely romantic comedy with a difference. Then along comes this story, the whole complete story with twist and everything. So, what is a girl to do? So I’ve been trying to write two novels at once. Now, I don’t care what anyone else says, but writing two novels at the same time is very difficult especially when the genres are so different.

I’ve also been trying to study and find time for my new crafting hobby of knitting and crochet. This has of course meant that Facebook and other social media have taken a back seat in my life. So forgive me if I haven’t been getting back to you on those as quickly as normal. There’s something about Facebook, however, that really brings out the negative in me. I know I’ve talked about this before. But reading about other people’s lives and how well they are doing, really affects me. I can’t help feeling that maybe I’m not doing as well. That perhaps my writing isn’t so great compared to other writers. Then there are those that talk about how well their books are doing. I’m pleased for anyone who does well. But I always feel like I am lacking in some way. People seem so confident on Facebook whereas I am far from confident. I know I’m not the only one who feels this way about Facebook. Then there are the selfie photos of other friends looking slim and fantastic whereas I feel frumpy, overweight and unattractive. It becomes too much some days. I find my time on Instagram is much nicer. So do feel free to join me on there. It doesn’t seem to affect me in the same way. There is also this odd thing of when people suddenly unfriend you. You spend days wondering why. But I’ve finally come to the conclusion that these people weren’t my friends anyway. I had a few uncomfortable incidents on Facebook when my account was hacked and temporarily deactivated and people automatically assumed I had unfriended them. I don’t unfriend people. I unfollow if the posts unsettle me but I don’t unfriend. Facebook unsettles my confidence. I like to hear if it unsettles yours too and if so why you stay on it? I stay to promote my books really. But I much prefer Instagram.  I also find there are misleading news stories and manipulated images which I now have to tell myself are not always what they seem. Posts to share if you care about someone with cancer which I find disturbing because they hint if I don’t share them then I can’t care about people with cancer or any other debilitating illness which is completely untrue. Finally the chain letters that come via Facebook which I feel bad about if I don’t send out to 15 friends. I seriously don’t have the time and I get quite a lot of these. So when I read this article about how Facebook can affect your mood, I could very much relate.

So, back to books and the two new ones which will be coming out very soon. The romantic comedy is lovely and I have so much enjoyed writing it. The two main characters will be making an appearance on Facebook in the next few months. So, look out for that. I will have a cover reveal too and giveaways. So don’t miss them. Meanwhile you can buy my two other thrillers on Amazon.



The new thriller I am very excited about. I’ve loved writing this one. I think it is far better than ‘Remember Me’ or ‘Secrets and Lies.’ The cover reveal for the new thriller will be coming very soon. There will also be giveaways. So check the links below to connect with me and make sure your eyes are peeled so you can take part.

So, tell me your feelings about Facebook. Do you find it false? Do you think it is all Smoke and Mirrors? Is it a good or bad thing?

Okay, that’s my little rant over.

Finally I’d like to talk tea. Are you a tea drinker? Do you have a favourite tea? If so what is it? I have a new tea cup and I love it.



I’m tea addicted. I love pretty mugs, pretty teapots and different teas. I love The Tea Experience and Jollybrew tea company and of course Wittards. I love tea leaves. There is nothing like a proper pot of tea.

My favourites at the moment are ‘Angel Grey’ which I’m telling everyone about and getting them to try. It’s the most amazing tea. It’s by The Tea Experience and is a subtle combination of black tea, orange slices and rose petals with a dash of bergamot and natural flavouring. You can get a trial size here

I also love Lady Grey by Twinings which is a beautiful tea. A slightly orange twang to this one. 124455lady_grey


Another favourite of mine is White Rose tea. This is a white tea by T2 Tea. This is a glorious white tea. You must try it. It is heaven in a teacup. If you have a favourite tea, do tell me about it.

I look forward to sharing the new books with you in the next few months and hearing about your favourite teas.

Lots of love



15 thoughts on “The Downside of Facebook and How Tea Helps.

  1. I can totally relate to your feelings about Facebook! The thing is, most of my Facebook friends feel the same. It does leave me feeling like a big fat failure a lot of the time, and it’s hard not to look at other people and compare. Their lives always seem so much more successful! But deep down I know, as do you, that we mostly only post the positive stuff. It’s very deceptive and should be taken with a large pinch of salt. When you’re feeling low, vulnerable, insecure, it’s the worst place to be. Why do I stay? Because I have some lovely FB friends – you included – and I like to know how they are, hear their news, see their pictures. On good days! 😊 Instagram is great. Far less pressure on there. As for tea – I’m afraid I know nothing except I love a good strong mug of Yorkshire Tea and drink several of them throughout the day. My friend Alex is a tea addict and far more sophisticated. She’s probably tried the ones you mention. I may have to try them one day. X

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Sharon. It’s so nice to hear I’m not alone, although I felt that I wasn’t. It is very hard to look at others and not compare how you’re doing with them. I find it hard to be boastful on Facebook though. I always enjoy your posts and very much like seeing your new book covers as they are so vivid and imaginative. I agree a lot of the posts should be taken with a pinch of salt and I really must start doing that. Thank you so much for responding. It makes such a difference. Enjoy your tea. There’s nothing like a good brew. xxxxxx


  2. Oh Lynda, I didn’t know you felt like that on Facebook. I agree there are positives but also negatives and I would probably venture to say more of the latter. I very rarely share anything, only if it is a cause close to my heart and I have verified it first. I don’t do chains either. I wondered about coming off Facebook not because of (touch wood) any bad experiences but because it is invasive and a very good time waster. For an author I can see the importance of social media and I found it useful when I blogged about books and had more time to keep my photo blog up to date. I agree about photos its amazing what a bit of Photoshop can do or editing on phones, remember a lot are enhanced so don’t compare, it’s really not worth it. You are unique, you have a wonderful sense of humour, a lovely person ( I know we have never met in person but my contact with you over books has always been a good experience, and yes, I do owe you a review which I will get around to at some point). If we all looked the same the world would be boring, differences of all kinds are what make the world go around. I take my hat off to all authors because you put your hard work out there and have to take some flak. I’m not sure I could deal with that but you do. Tea, love it. I’m currently into Twinings Chai and Earl Grey big time at the moment. I must try some of your suggestions they sound wonderful, so a big thank you from me. I am happy to find you on whatever social media you choose. xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your kind words, Jan. I enjoy your posts too. It is because of posts like yours that I stay on Facebook. The good outweigh the bad so to speak. But, of course, I need to stay on there for promotion purposes. I enjoy your posts on Instagram too. I haven’t tried the Twinings Chai. I keep meaning to. I hope you enjoy my recommendations. Let me know what you think. xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I can also relate to what you are saying. Its been five years now since I came off face book, all for the same reasons you are saying. I love all your books, and can’t wait for more to come out in 2018.


  3. Hi Lynda,

    Yes, I find facebook a trial somedays, for all the reasons you stated. I’ve been unfriended (by family no less), but have never unfriended anyone myself. Like you, I unfollow. Especially those ‘share if you care’ posts, and animal cruelty posts. Doesn’t mean I don’t care. I care too much sometimes, and that hurts more when others don’t. Someday’s I just scroll through facebook (like skimming a textbook), until I see one of your posts. Your posts are absolutely heart warming and positive. I wish I could write as good as you. And I wouldn’t let other writers bother you with their ‘perfect posts and perfect lives’. Maybe they exaggerate just a little? You are beautiful just the way you are, not “frumpy, overweight and unattractive”. Never apologise for living your life, as long as you do what makes happy and has purpose. I’m still trying to find my purpose (I’ve narrowed it down to sustainability, organisation and cooking). If any of my facebook posts/shares upset you, then please let me know. I try to post/share only positive stories and experiences.

    I too, suffer from low confidence, and it is so easy for someone to ‘cut me down’. ‘Tall poppy syndrome’ is rampant in Australia, where no one can be better than anyone else. I’m studying a Bachelor of Business (Management) at University, and I’m doing really well, academically and my confidence is growing a little at a time. I also try to get to as many networking events as I can, which is no easy feat, as I wear hearing aids, making it difficult to understand conversation.

    I’m not really a tea drinking, but when I do have a cuppa, I go for herbals. No sugar, no milk. I mostly have flat white coffee with 1 sugar. If you ever holiday in Australia, then you’re welcome at our humble home near Brisbane, for a cup of tea and a chat, or even bed and breakfast.

    All the best with your writing. Stand proud! You’ve published books! Better than most people have done in a lifetime.
    Sometimes I think writing is a lottery, there are so many authors and want to be authors, trying to get their books read, for your books to be read you have won the lottery.

    Take care, and all best with all that you endeavour to do.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Diane. Good luck with all that you do. I will certainly look you up whenever we return to Australia. Yes, I am sure many people say they are doing fantastic when they probably aren’t at all. But it is tedious when you’re scrolling down your newsfeed and most of your time is spent unfollowing or feeling agitated at what you see. I’m glad you enjoy my posts and the books. Thank you so much for your kind words. I hope the studying goes well. It’s not easy but admirable so all the best. Much love Lynda xxx


  4. I feel your pain re Facebook and I only stay on now for books and blogging. Now tea, I could talk hours over. I’ve found a new favourite it’s called rosy cheeks by Leaves of the World based in Hull. A fellow blogger is an ambassador for them so if you’d like to order type in code TEANOMADKIM20 for 20% off your first order.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I need to be on FB to promote my blog posts and I like seeing what people are up to. However I have found in some of the groups people can be really nasty. I’ve had to delete a thread on one of the groups. The other nasty one can be Twitter but I don’t spend time on Twitter.
    Instagram I think is nice but I don’t really spend time there but I do post.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Ahhhh, Facebook. I stayed away from FB for 3.5 months and loved it. I accomplished so much more in life. The pictures we see on social media are just that, pictures. A beautiful sitting room, may be beautiful yet the rest of the home a mess. Those beautiful family pics. Maybe the husband cheats and the children are wild and in trouble often. Many hours may have gone into snapping that one staged moment. I have friends who are married to their high school sweethearts and I could look upon them with awe. Yet, they look at me divorced for numerous years, traveling, doing what I want when I want and be envious. They admire my freedom, I admire their having someone to help with finances, household maintenance. You never know what’s behind the image.
    I keep my friends list low to those who truly understand me. I’m a Scot living in the states and even though I am not a citizen nor able to vote the past Presidential elections here caused many a war and unfriending according to several of my friends. They soon learned to divide people into friends and acquaintance categories. I personally found my true friends will call, text or email.
    As for writing in different genres I tried to lock myself into routines and genre. Yet, my mind just doesn’t work that way. I have a few projects. Contemporary romance, mystery, children’s and a memoir. The memoir is not for publication but for my family, so I dawdle. The children’s book may possibly divide into different age categories. I am slowly learning I am under no timeline and to enjoy the process. I have let go of the intimidation I once felt to “do it” the way I thought everyone else was.
    Thank you for your post Lynda. It reminded me to relax, breath and enjoy.
    I look forward to your new books.

    April G

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s